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Videogame characters have always been designed in a variety of over the top ways and one of my favorite character-building feature has always been the beard. Here’s my take on who should be given the titles of “Most Epic Beard in Videogame History”
Captain LeChuck – Monkey Island series
“Aren’t we taking this skull-and-crossbones thing a bit too far, cap’n?”
The main villain in the Monkey Island series, LeChuck is one of the most infamous videogame pirates ever, and just like any other nasty pirate – he has the beard to show for it.
From your standard shaggy scruff, to a ghostly glowing green, to a furiously fiery fluff, LeChuck has donned some of the most epic beards in videogame history.
Dr. Light – Megaman series
“Dyeing only works on my eyebrows, these days.”
The roboticist supergenius who gave birth to Mega Man and a bunch of other super robots, Doctor Thomas Light from the Mega Man series sports a fluffy white beard that would make jolly old St. Nick himself proud.
And while some of you may argue that Light’s beard isn’t all that special, consider how he gracefully combines the beard with a well-groomed pompadour – and what’s this? – a mullet, ladies and gentlemen. Throw in the lab coat and you’ve got yourself a bearded science rockstar.
Captain Price – Call of Duty: Modern Warfare series
One of the most deserving of the “most epic beard” title and the possessor of undoubtedly the baddest pair of muttonchops in all of videogamedom, Price has “badass” down to a tee.
Liam Neeson would play the hell out of this role
Captain Price, callsign “Bravo Six”, is a British special forces soldier featured in the Modern Warfare series of the Call of Duty franchise. His muttonchops of legend, coupled with his boonie hat and love for stogies, definitely earns him a spot on this list.
Gordon Freeman – Half-Life series
The main protagonist of the Half-Life series, Gordon Freeman is a theoretical physicist who ends up having to fend off aliens and other enemies to protect the world.
“For the last time – this is a crowbar, not a walking cane; and I am not Hugh Laurie!”
Being a scientist and all, Freeman sports a rockin’ goatee and a pair of thick, black-framed glasses, making him a hero to geeks and hipsters alike.
Zangief – Street Fighter series
The lean, mean, wrestling machine also known as the “Red Cyclone” is actually one of the least used characters in the famed Street Fighter Series due to the fact that despite packing a powerful punch, Zangief is one slow mother.
Zangief, however, deserves to be on this list for that magnificently manly beard he has, which is awkwardly disconnected from his mohawk, but still works. And while we’re on the subject of Zangief’s hair, what’s with his chest? Better question: what is up with his shins?
Max Payne – Max Payne series
To be fair, it was 2001
Gamers out of touch for the past few months might be wondering what the famous sour-faced noir antihero Max Payne is doing in this list when his first 2 games showcased the titular gunslinger with nothing but a mere scruff compared to the other guys in this list. Well, the third installment from the series gave Max a major overhaul:
Oh yeah, that’s good ol’ Max Payne himself from Max Payne 3 which was released just July of last year. Max Payne 3 gave the character a harder, grittier look, with Max falling further into depression; his body and mind wasting away – until the game picks up, that is. Max Payne 3 put Max in one of the most awesome grief beards in videogame history, adding to that “nothing left to lose” feel of the character from all the Max Payne titles.
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