You’re smart, funny, beautiful. You have no trouble getting dates. But how come none of those ever work out into a real, long term relationship? The guy asks you out, you have dinner a few times, but after a while his interest fizzles out, he never calls again.
Maybe it’s bad luck, maybe you’re dating the wrong guys, or maybe you could be unconsciously sending out cues that are scaring off your dates. Read on and find out.
Are you outspoken…or combative?
It’s wonderful to be intelligent and opinionated. In fact, many guys find these traits quite attractive and exciting. (And those who just want an idiot who’ll say yes to everything he says just aren’t worth dating.) But there’s a line between being expressive and being downright argumentative. Do you tend to steer conversation towards controversial topics and then spend the whole evening cutting down your date’s opinions while ‘proving’ that you’re right? Do you look disappointed, or even get angry, if he doesn’t seem to agree?
A good conversationalist can talk intelligently about a number of topics, but these discussions should help you exchange perspectives—not be a battle for intellectual superiority.
Are you nurturing…or hovering?
You’re sweet, thoughtful, and just love to love your man. At first he may enjoy these attentions, and even think that he’s so lucky to find a girl who’ll shower him with attention and compliments. But there’s a fine line between being sweet, and looking desperate. Guys need space, especially in the early stages of a relationship, and hovering over them can make them feel like a trapped animal.
Are you too much like ‘buddy’ material?
You can talk about baseball stats and get top scores at video games. That’s awesome—what guy wouldn’t want a girl who understood his interests and is fun to hang around? But just because you can ‘hang out with the guys’ doesn’t mean that you should totally turn into one yourself. Be sure to keep some of that feminine mystery and allure, especially in the early stages of the dating game. Sure, go bowling with him and his friends—but wear a sexy perfume and engage in some flirtatious banter, even as you prove that you can chow down pizza and beer with the best of them. This incredible combination of being ‘down to earth’ and being hot, hot, hot is actually irresistible.
Photo from marieclaire.com