Have you ever had the feeling that your partner is hiding something from you? If so, you are not alone in experiencing it. When in a relationship, cheating is perhaps one of the biggest issues that people have to face. Check any relationship advice forum or site, and you will realize that a lot of people have to deal with cheating. There are reasons for cheating, although I firmly believe that there is never an excuse for it.
That being said, what do you do if you have this niggling feeling that your partner is not being true? Do you just close your eyes and hope it all goes away, or do you do something about it and try to find out? If you prefer to go the latter route, here is a perfect set of life tips for you: how to determine if your partner is cheating on you.
If you think about it, you can find a lot of relationship advice that will give you pointers on how to know if your partner is cheating on you. If you sort through them, though, you will realize that there really are only two major ways: either you go the direct route and force a confrontation, or you go the subtle route and do some digging first. Let us look at these two methods and the specific things that you can do to get to the truth.
Grab the bulls by the horns: confront your partner
This works for some people – not all. Confrontation is the simplest way to go about it. You simple have a talk with your partner, explaining your side and asking him or her straight out. While it may be the simplest way, it certainly is not the least painful.
A confrontation can go both ways.
A confrontation can lead to settling the fact that there is no infidelity going on.
This is of course what we are all hoping to hear. No one wants to find out that his or her partner is cheating. If both people are mature enough to handle a confrontation and there is nothing to hide, then this could very well be the best method.
A confrontation can lead to damaging the relationship, maybe irreparably.
Whether or not your partner is cheating, if he or she doesn’t take the confrontation well – and if you do not approach it the right way – then additional stress will be put on your relationship. This may very well lead to a break up.
So how do you make sure you take the right approach? Only you can determine that since you know yourself and your partner best. One thing to bear in mind: do not go with guns a-blazing. Sure, it is hard not to be accusatory in this situation, but avoid piling the blame from the get go. Be firm, but nice.
Sniff out the evidence: do some digging
The subtle route, on the other hand, can go before the confrontation. In fact, it might be better to dig around first before you confront your partner. In digging for evidence, you might find out that your fears are unfounded – and you can drop the whole thing.
How do you sniff out the evidence?
Be more aware, but do not be paranoid.
I strongly believe in what they call women’s intuition. Some say it’s baloney, but even as a male, I have seen that in action so many times. If you are a woman and you have that intuition, do not ignore it. Be more focused and look for signs. Word of caution: DO NOT GO OVERBOARD. It is very easy to become paranoid, but if you want to find out the truth and perhaps even make things work after it, focus on your immediate goal: to find out if your partner is cheating on you.
Keep a tighter watch on finances, phone bills, and the like.
Here are specific ways you can pay more attention. There are countless signs that may point towards a cheating partner. However, different situations have different signs. You CANNOT apply everything to your own situation! The idea is to check out things that may be anomalous. Do regular inexplicable expenses come up? Are there phone calls that cannot be explained rationally? Is your partner spending less and less time with you for no legitimate reason? Pay attention to tiny details but make sure that you are open to the truth – whether or not it points towards your partner cheating.
If things really do get bad, you might want to consider hiring someone to keep tabs on your partner. I would not suggest this route unless you are ready to face implications and consequences. On the one hand, you might find out for real that your partner is indeed cheating. What then?
On the other hand, you might find out NOTHING, and your partner might find out that you conducted surveillance on him or her. THAT is definitely not going to go well.
The bottom line is that you can do whatever it takes to find out if your partner is cheating, but you also have to be ready to deal with the fallout.
Photo via The U.S. Army