We’ve all heard about them – rebound relationships. Some people scoff at them, others shrug, while others say go for it! What are rebound relationships, anyhow? The prevailing idea is that a rebound relationship is something that a person goes into when recovering from a previously broken relationship. Whether you were married or not, a break up is a break up. Sure, there are differences, but the pain and all other emotions are just as real. The rebound relationship comes shortly after this break up. What you may not know is that one can engage in a rebound relationship without having “officially” left the current relationship. If, for example, a couple has been having problems and one partner has distanced himself/herself emotionally, and then enters another relationship, that new relationship can be classified as rebound.
The question now is this: are rebound relationships always bad? Are there any instances wherein they may actually do some good? If you have just gone through a break up, here are some things that you might want to know about rebound relationships.
Rebound relationships are not necessarily “evil”
As a matter of fact, some counselors and psychologists suggest that rebound relationships might be necessary for some people in order for them to get distracted from the pain that a break up brings. While this is not always the best route to take, having someone to spend time with and share things with can be good for the person who is trying to move on.
Word of caution: Do NOT bring great expectations with you when you enter a rebound relationship. No matter what you do or think, this other person will not make up for what you have lost. Neither will he/she solve whatever issues you may have. Bottom line: recognize it for what it can be – a distraction.
Rebound relationships are most often unfair to the party – the one who did not just come out of a broken relationship
That being said, there really is nothing much to be explained. If you are that person who is entering a rebound relationship with a person whose heart has just been broken, know that you are risking being used – maybe not wittingly, but in essence, that just might be what is happening. If, on the other hand, you are the one who is healing, then you need to acknowledge this fact every single day. The rebound relationship need not turn into a disastrous one, but you need to exert effort to make sure that you aren’t simply using the other person. On the other hand, if both of you are in agreement about the rebound relationship’s purpose, then I see nothing wrong with it.
Rebound relationships are usually entered into by people who have “love addiction”
Is it wrong to be addicted to love? Perhaps not, but in this sense, it can be harmful to both parties. When one enters a relationship, it should be for the right reasons – because you are truly attracted to each other. For some people, however, it is the idea of love that they fall in love with. They need to be with someone, regardless of who it is. This brings about false expectations, among many other things. In most cases, this kind of premise will only end up in both parties being hurt – again. Before you enter a relationship after a break up, scrutinize yourself: do you really like this person or do you like the idea of being with someone more?
Rebound relationships can help you discover more things about yourself
This is another reason that rebound relationships may actually be good for some people. Of course, the statement is qualified by the use of “can” – it is not always the case. When you enter a relationship with another person, whether or not it is on the rebound, you interact with another human being. In simple terms, you discover new things, encounter new experiences. This almost always brings new realizations. If you are smart, you’ll take these new things and use them to learn more about yourself and how you deal with things that come your way.
Entering a rebound relationship need not always be a negative thing. You ought to remember, though, that rebound or not, relationships should not be the basis of your own happiness and self-worth.
Rebound relationships suck. I should know, I’ve been in a couple of them.
Sometimes the besr thing you can do is to just go on a “break” from the dating scene.